It's Not Easy Being Perfect
by Wevadryn
Summary: There is something very wrong with Draco, and Harry wants to find out. Things are haunting the school, and these things work for Voldemort. Harry's now up to save these lives- and his love. (R/herm pairing, Harry/herm Ha/Dr)
1. Pure Light,

It's Not Easy Being Perfect.  
  
Author's note: This is a kind of depressing fic, but it get's better in the end. Really, it does :) I guess you could call it a little bit of fluff mixed in there. Also, this does involve homosexual feelings between two teenage boys, so if you're offended, go somewhere else and read. (Harry/Draco pairing, Ron/Hermione, Hermione/Harry)  
  
Copywrite: All of the characters are copywrite J.K Rowling and Warner Bros. I am not using this to gain money, or whatever, I am doing this for the entertainment of myself, and of course the readers :)  
  
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Draco looked in the mirror, worry spreading across his face at his thighs and stomach. He could tell that if he didn't lose some pounds, he would get fat and ugly like Crabbe and Goyle- mind you, no one would want to be that ugly, but especially not him! It wasn't that he was obese, or anything, he was perfectly normal for a boy his height. His mind was in a silent fight between his fathers words of perfection, and his own gut feeling of telling him he was perfectly fine. 'It's probably just puberty.' He would tell himself, but then his fathers words would come rolling back into his head like an obsession.  
  
"Draco, you must be the best for Voldomort when it comes your time to be marked. Be at your VERY best..."  
  
It wasn't really his father, Lucius's words, it was more the way he said it, and the way his fathers pierced his own son's eye in understanding.  
  
Draco had never really even seen Voldomort, but of course had heard of him and his great accomplishments. He was going to meet him when this Hogwarts year had ended, and he would leave to Malfoy Manor.  
  
Draco's pov.  
  
Being 119 Ibs. 5'4 with a small frame, I wonder how this could ever have happened. Maybe I had gained a few pounds since I had last looked at the scale. I sighed, bringing myself to walk back to my bed and put my school robe back on, that had just before layered the green and silver satin sheets on the bed. {Oh well, might as well go to class, now. If I eat breakfast, I'll probably begin pigging out like Goyle...} I cringed at the thought of me stuffing myself full of delicious sweets and chocolates. No...that can't happen. It won't.  
  
Walking down the dark corridors that lead to the dormitories, I reached the Slytherin common room, stopped, and sighed to think. {I'll never be like my father want's me to be} My pessimistic side shouted out at me. Shaking my head, I attempted at washing the bad thought away as soon as I could. I walked out into the dark halls of Hogwarts and headed for Transfiguration. Unfortunatly on the way, I meet up with Harry Potter. The slimy little mud- blood loving Gryffindor, always so loyal to his friends. Alwats worshiped by everyone around him.  
  
{You're jealous.} A tiny voice whispered mischeviously in the depths of my mind. I walked past the oblivious Potter, feeling Ron's scowl on my back. I didn't want to fight with them right now. Without Crabbe and Goyle, I wouldn't take my bloody chances. Potter had sent so many curses and hexes my way to brand even Voldomort weak. Which, of course, he wasn't. {See! Even Potter is better than you!} The tiny voice squeaked inside my head. 'Damn concience!' Scowling, I walked into Transfiguration, and went through it as normal, snickering at when others made mistakes, or laughing at the stupid idiots' faces just for the fun of it.  
  
Everything goes okay, until I have to face Harry Potter and his no-good friends in potions (in which we're ironicly always together in, every year.)  
  
"Hey, Malfoy, watch where you're going!" I heard the Weasel scream after me, as I bumped into him, and went ahead a few feet. Deciding to stand up for myself, I turned around at his voice. His round face, which was only a few shades lighter than his hair, was the first thing I saw.  
  
"No, I won't watch where I'm going, thank-you-very-much. I have things to acually DO, instead of hang around with you stupid Gryffindors...['a slight pause of thought here']... I'm- in a hurry." In truth, it was really hard for me to come up with a comeback, and whenever I do, it's NEVER nice, no matter which person I am talking to (with the exception of my father and Voldomort of course, even though I haven't acually MET Voldomort yet.) It just kind of- comes out.  
  
After a while, lunch rolled around, and of course, I was starving. Had to eat something. As I walked into the Great Hall, I smelled the delicious smell of, of course, food. Scuffling over to the table oppisite of the Gryffindors, I sat down at my normal spot in Slytherin, and watched as Goyle and Crabbe stuffed themselves full of food, along with other people (who were eating and talking at the same time, acually, which was kind of gross in my opinion). Taking a roll out of one of the bread baskets, I started eating it, and looked at it after I had taken a small, sampling bite. For some reason, I wasn't hungry anymore. I felt my brow furrow, as I looked down into my lap, thoughts running wild in my head. No, this isn't how I could lose weight. I won't subject myself to harmful labour and excersice as though my life depends on it. No matter what.  
  
I was still hungry, although my appitite was spoiled. I just couldn't bring it to my mouth. There was something vile about it. It wasn't poisoned, or anything, it was just...I couldn't bring myself to consume it.  
  
Harry's pov.  
  
Hermione was talking about the Herbology homework that we had to do during the weekend, and I kind of zoned out. It wasn't that I didn't like Hermione's company, it was that...she could get annoying. Very, VERY annoying.  
  
Dumbledore said I should watch my back this year. I don't really know why. We had a talk yesterday about some ghost-like spies being in the school. Unfortunatly, he didn't know who they were. He had only been informed when the ministry of magic had reported it just as a warning for all of the students, as well as the staff.  
  
"Harry, are you listening to me?" Hermione cut into my thoughts like butter, and I was flicked back to attention, nodding my head like a lying idiot, my eyes fakely yearning for more book knowledge. I heard her sigh, and continue talking. "Honstly Harry, you've always been like this. Even though you are a hero, and Dumbledore told you to watch your back doesn't mean you should slack off on your classes!" She scolded. {I'll just feel sorry for her future children} Harry thought with pity. For some odd reason, though, I kind of liked her. More than a friend. Cho had kind of faded out of my thoughts after the rumour in fourth year of her having sex with one of the other ravenclaws. I don't know why I was attracted to her, really. When it came right down to it, she was as much of a git as Malfoy was.  
  
After a while, my classes were done for the day, and I went back to my dormitories. Lying on my bed, I sighed, taking in the sweet autumn air from Ron opening the windows before I even got here. I closed my eyes, and opened them back up. {It would be a very nice day for me to have some fresh air and watch a sunset.} I thought. Looking out the window confirmed that it was a nice afternoon outside, so I stood up, heading out the door.  
  
Draco's pov.  
  
I needed some time to think tonight. Something to distract me from my problems. Goyle was the latest. He kept asking me if I had smuggled any food into the dormitories, and annoyingly I responded, "NO, Goyle, I HAVEN'T!" He wandered off to roam around the school for some odd reason or another, leaving me alone with Crabbe. "Um...I'll just...go then." He said, after a long silence.  
  
Glad that the two loafs were off, I walked off into the direction of my door, broom in hand after acheiving it from the polished chest in the corner of the dorm.  
  
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The lake was very peaceful, unlike peoples' lives, unfortunatly. Why couldn't we be more like this lake? The wind chilled my face, and made a shrill shiver go up my spine. I crossed my arms to keep a little warmer from the early warnings of winter to come, and shivered a little more slightly, and shut my eyes to block out the vision of everything.  
  
Narator's viewpoint  
  
Draco slowly opened his eyes back up, only to see Harry not far away, also staring at the lake deep in thought. {I wonder what Potter's thinking about right now- or who.} Draco sneered. He hated the bloody seeker, The-Boy-Who- Lived, The one who had defeated the Dark Lord, not once, not twice, but about four times. It was pathetic that Harry could acually do it when he was just a damn teenage boy!  
  
His skin from his palms were going to seep with blood in a while, but before that could happen, Draco stopped his fingernails from digging into his flesh when he saw Granger starting to approach Harry. Damn that mudblood. They always spoiled his good moments, even ones that he thought they couldn't even reach him from. Instead of taking his rage out on his palms, he grabbed the grass and rapidly ripped out blade by blade, staring at each one like it were his worst enemy.  
  
Harry had also noticed Draco not far away, but really didn't feel like putting up with his little weak insults. "Harry, how are you? You are ok, aren't you?" Hermione asked, concerned.  
  
Harry looked down into the lake, and nodded. "Ya, Hermione, I'm ok. Just a little worried, that's all." He responded, still staring deeply in thought.  
  
Hermione sighed, and looked at Harry. "Harry, did you ever know Ron had a crush on me?" She asked. Harry, broken from thought, looked at her, suddenly offended that his best friend- Ron Weasley, wouldn't have told him that secret. "No. Does he?" Harry asked surprised, gasping lightly at the confession. She nodded, a faint smile spreading across her lips. She was starting to flush a little at the thought of Ron liking her, her smile plastered to her lips. {What if Harry likes me?} She asked herself worringly, looking at Harry's expression. "Harry, if you like me, just know that I will always be here. I will always be your friend." She responded rather quickly.  
  
Harry looked down and sighed. "No, Hermione, I don't have that much of a crush on you. I like you as a friend, of course. I'm just ...kind of bugged that Ron never told me that he liked you."  
  
"Harry, Ron has his own feelings and secrets, you know. You should respect that." Hermione said, matter-of-factly.  
  
"Ya...you're right." Harry gave in, and laid on the soft, cold grass. The clouds were odd today, starting to get gray, and clouds were coming from the east.  
  
Ignoring them, Harry sat back up and looked back at Hermione as she spoke. "Well, Harry, I better be going. It's almost nightfall, and I have to get the last of my Herbology homework done." She said, with a sigh. Harry watched, as she walked away slowly from the lake towards Hogwarts.  
  
It was nightfall at 8:30 PM, and Harry was still out there. As well as Draco. They really had nothing else to do. Off in the distance, both Draco and Harry turned their heads to the east as they heard a swirling sound...a loud....loud...banging, swirling sound. Wind. A tornado. Getting up, Harry nervously started walking away from the lake. Hagrids' house was closer than Hogwarts, so he started heading that way.  
  
Draco didn't really know where to go. So, of course, he followed Harry. {Damn him....stupid Harry Potter. I hate him!} He recited as he followed Harry to Hagrid's hut. As Harry got into the hut, the door was slammed and locked. Draco was left outside, staring at the door when he caught up. {Damn that Potter!} He recited once more. If he had to swear to something, he would swear that Harry did that in spite.  
  
"Hey, let me in!" Draco demanded, knocking on the door viciously. After about 3 minutes, Hagrid opened the door, and sighed. "Com'on en Mist-er Malfoy." Hagrid opened the door, and Draco walked in to see Harry snug in a maroon-red chair, reading a book. Draco rolled his eyes, and sat down on the couch a few feet away from where the chair was placed. Hagrid found Malfoy VERY rude. He didn't thank anyone, didn't listen to rules, and was a bloody coward in his eyes. Hagrid unconciencly sighed, and shook his head, as he stirred the mysterious goup in the pot.  
  
Harry's pov.  
  
I tried not to let it get to me. The fact that stupid Malfoy was let in by Hagrid out of pure pity. He was annoying and selfish, and didn't care for anyone other than himself.  
  
"Potter, can I ask you something?" Draco asked, looking at me waiting for my approval. My mouth was thinned into a line, and I wondered what he would acually ask me that wasn't rude or stupid.  
  
Draco just asked, without my approval. Maybe he thought that if I didn't reply, that was approval. Oh well.  
  
"Harry, how much do you weigh?" He asked, a question that had surprised me. I had never, ever expected that to come out of Malfoy's mouth. Maybe Hermione, based on she would probably go off about it being healthy or whatever response. And....oddly....very VERY oddly...he had said my first name. Nevertheless, I decided to answer his strange question anyway.  
  
"123 Ibs. Why?" I asked, kind of confused.  
  
"Just wondering Potter. No need to get defensive."  
  
I looked at him for a few seconds trying to search the truth in his gray, emotionless eyes, but to no avail. Shaking my head, I turned my attention back to my book.  
  
'Don't ever walk away from me again, Shane. It isn't fair that I have to live without you. Please, don't-'  
  
"Potter, is it really safe in here?" Draco asked, again turning my attention away from my book. He was starting to get annoying. This was a really important part in the book!  
  
"Yes, Malfoy, it's safe." Harry responded exasperantly.  
  
From the corner of Harry's eye, he saw Draco looking around fearfully. {Damnit, Malfoy, stop distracting me!} Harry accused silently.  
  
'I love you Shane. Please, stay here, with me, and our children. I never-'  
  
"Potter, why are-" Draco started.  
  
"Damnit, Malfoy, shut up! I'm trying to read this, if you haven't noticed!" Harry yelled with annoyance.  
  
"Fine, Potter, Be that way. I was just going to ask you why you're so perfect, but I guess you really don't want to talk to me, then." Draco finished. He really wanted to know why. Why he was worshiped, liked, LOVED, and aside from general contridiction, had a very nice body. [Whoa....Did I just....think that!?] Draco asked himself with a hidden panic, and then quickly shaming himself for it.  
  
Harry was stunned. "Malfoy, is there something wrong with you?!" Harry's eyes widened. Why was he even talking to Draco anyway?  
  
"No, not really Potter, unless you're talking about my twisted sense of humour. Other than that, I'm fine. Just answer my question." Draco asked seriously, narrowing his eyes ever so slightly.  
  
Harry didn't know what to say. Perfect? He wasn't perfect at all! He was ugly, stupid when it came right down to it, and he didn't have as many true friends as he would like. And the attention he got from the press was horrific, annoying, and fearful.  
  
"I'm not perfect." He said as a fact. Draco then had an impressed expression plastered on his face.  
  
"Nice of you to think so lowly of yourself, Potter, but stop denying it. It's childish." Draco said, smirking.  
  
"Malfoy, if it was up to me, I would start thinking that you THOUGHT I was perfect!" Harry stated. Draco looked up from thought and sighed. He decided not to answer.  
  
"Draco..." Harry asked again, cussing slightly, noticing he had accidently let his worst enemys' name slip out. Getting back to normal thought, he then started to wonder if Draco was going to respond to him or not. Just then, Harry noticed the absence of Hagrid, and remembered Hagrid half telling him he was going to Hogwarts to keep the students there safe, if needed, and that Harry and Draco would be safe in his hut. Relieved, Harry sighed, and relaxed.  
  
Looking over at Draco, I saw him holding his stomach, gulping once and staring at the fire.  
  
"Belly ache?" I asked him, kind of feeling sorry for him. Ya, he WAS a slimy git, but he was still just a fraction human.  
  
Draco looked at me, and didn't nod or shake his head just stared. He then looked down to the floor, and back up into the fire. "No. I'm kind of hungry though."  
  
"Didn't you eat?" I asked, just a bit of concern in my voice.  
  
"Why do you care, Potter?" Draco asked coldly. I defensivly backed off, allowing Draco his thinking room.  
  
A long silence had resulted, and unfortunatly it wasn't a peaceful kind of silence. It was tense. Like both of us were afraid to really talk to each other, afraid of the result.  
  
"You could eat the stuff Hagrid is cooking-" without getting to finish, I was interrupted.  
  
"I am not putting any part of that- stuff- inside me!" Draco responded, looking resolutly disgusted at the suggestion.  
  
"You said you were hungry." Harry stated.  
  
"Yes, but not that hungry." Draco shot back.  
  
"When was the last time you ate, anyway?" Harry asked, just out of curiosity.  
  
"Why are you concerned, Potter?"  
  
"Because I'm curious, not concerned." I denied. I was slightly concerned. Not alot, though.  
  
Narrator pov.  
  
"The last time I ate was at lunch. A bite of role. Lost my appetite. The acual time I really ate was yesterday at dinner." Draco responded truthfully. Didn't matter anyways, it didn't mean Harry would care. He was probably glad that Draco was atleast making an attempt to make himself suffer over some odd reason or another.  
  
Draco looked back over to Harry, and Harry was looking at him, unblinking. "What?" Draco asked, wondering what Harry was staring at. Harry shook his head to stop staring and asked, "Draco, if you were hungry, why haven't you ate?" Harry asked. Ha! Stupid boy. He didn't even know my true motive, so he should stay out of my buisness.  
  
"Why does it matter?" Draco asked, looking at Harry again, expecting an answer. Harry sighed, and just layed back. {He was ...probably not hungry before or something.} Harry excused. Maybe that was it. It's not like he had to care, anyways.  
  
"When's that big oaf coming back, anyways?" Draco asked impatiently. Harry shrugged, while shooting his arch-nemisis a glare, and Draco yawned in silent response. He wasn't used to staying up this late, and even if he was, he would never, EVER go to sleep in this damn hut.  
  
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The sun shown through the little window the hut had available, and Dracos' eyes felt really, really droopy. He was obviously tired. Very tired. He had stayed up as late as he could to deny sleep, but it had took him over, anyway. Stupid Harry. It was his fault. {No it wasn't, Draco, and you know it.} The little voice responded back to his thought. Draco started getting mad at himself, and started to take deep, supposedly calming breaths. Opening his eyes halfway, he saw Harry on the other side of the hut sleeping like a baby. Draco got up groggily, and walked over to Harry. His black hair was messy (as usual) and his glasses were on the table on the side of the couch. {I shouldn't wake him. Not yet. What is he talking about, not perfect!? It's a bunch of lies if Harry really believed that he isn't special, worshipped more like.}  
  
Draco continued staring down at him. His skin was soft, as Draco's pale fingers trailed across Harry's flushed cheek. Harry moaned a little in his sleep and turned over, his back to Draco. Draco sighed. {He really is beautiful. If only he knew...} Draco's eyes widened at the fact that he had thought that, and he responded back to his thought in his mind, saying, {No. No! He isn't, Even though he is a stupid boy who is followed around and cheered for in Quidditch, and in the wizarding world, but in the valley of Voldomort, he is to no intrest in me!} Draco breathed a deep sigh, and walked away from the couch Harry was sleeping in. He walked over to the little window and looked out- everything was a disaster. The womping willow had many branches snapped off, but it was still well alive. The lake was filled with mud, although it would die down, anyway. The grass was ripped from some places, and Hogwarts hadn't been touched. Probably some magic Dumbledore had conjured with the other teachers and Hagrid.  
  
A philosiphical question came to Draco's mind. {I wonder what love feels like?} He asked himself. He tried to feel it, for anything. For someone, maybe. It wouldn't work. He didn't love anyone, he noticed. If he had, he would notice. He knew one thing- he loved power. Power, money, and looks. He loved them. But what would it feel if it...or they...were people??  
  
To the side, he heard Harry stirring. In reaction, he looked toward him. He had just opened his eyes, and was staring at Draco. "I'm not talking to you, Draco. So don't talk to me." He said. Confusedly, Draco asked, "I beg your pardon, Potter? Have I choked you in your sleep yet?" A faint smile crept across Harry's lips, as if he liked the reaction out of him.  
  
"I guess not. If you had, you'd probably be lying on the ground frozen, as I had my wand in hand the whole time I was asleep."  
  
{Stupid Harry. Always prepared. He's getting really very annoying, now.} Draco rolled his eyes, and heard a chuckle from Harry, and Draco, in turn, turned toward him. "What's so funny?" Draco asked, not amused by his light mood.  
  
"Nothing's funny. It was just the look on your face when I told you I sleep with my wand."  
  
"That's wrong, Potter. You know that?" I asked, a smile betraying to come to my lips. Damn body. Leave it to betray, it will.  
  
"Your not half bad, Malfoy. Not half bad." Harry said, still smirking a little.  
  
"Sure, Potter. Like you mean it." Draco asked scepticly.  
  
"I do." Harry repeated. "Want to go to breakfast?" Harry asked, again worried that Draco might not submit.  
  
"I guess." Draco responded, the smile fading from his lips.  
  
Walking out of the hut was like walking into alien territory. It was so...different. Nevertheless, Harry kept walking right towards Hogwarts.  
  
As they arrived at breakfast, they both went their own seperate ways.  
  
"Harry, where were you last night?!" Ron asked angrily, worry mixed in.  
  
"I was at Hagrid's, perfectly safe. Unfortunatly, I had to spend that whole time with Malfoy." They all looked over at the Slytherin table to look at Draco just for the fun of it. "That's odd....he's not eating."  
  
Hermione responded, "Well, Harry, that's not odd. He's probably just not hungry."  
  
Harry was silent for a second, and said, "He was last night. He said he hadn't ate since two nights ago."  
  
"Harry, it's Malfoy. Leave him to his own misery. Really, Harry, you care too much." Ron responded concernly.  
  
"And concerning you, Ron, why didn't you tell me you had a crush on Hermione?" Harry asked, a smile cracking at his lips. He was happy for them both, really, but a little sad to kind of be left out.  
  
"I don't know. I was afraid you might try and tell her or force me to try and go out with her." Ron stated. Harry was shocked. He would never do that. "Ron, why would you think that?"  
  
"I don't know, Harry, ok? I don't know. I guess I was just...worried." Ron responded, frowning. Harry sighed, and nodded. "Ok."  
  
Harry was still worried about Draco. He knew he shouldn't have been. He was, though. Oddly...he was. {He's your worst enemy, Harry, why are you even caring?!} He scolded himself. He sighed. No, he had to go see what was up with Draco, or his curiosity would topple him over and instead he would be doing it another time anyways.  
  
Following Draco out of the Great hall, he called out rather catchingly.  
  
"Draco! Wait up." Harry said loudly. Draco turned around like he had almost been attacked.  
  
"What do you want, Potter?" He said in quick response, his menecing facade going quickly into place.  
  
Besides his hateful manner, Harry decided to go through with what he came here to do in the first place. "Draco, what's wrong with you?"  
  
"Nothing Potter... what? Is there red and green spots all over my body? If I had, then you would surely be gaping." Draco said, with a large pound of sarcasm.  
  
"Draco, I noticed you didn't eat this morning." Harry stated.  
  
"And....? Your point being?" Draco was enjoying this little game of pity. He let a smirk slip, and added, "Potter, I would be watching your back more with all the ghosts and so-called spied around, and all. I wouldn't be worrying about me the least bit."  
  
"Well, Malfoy, I'm not you, am I?" Harry responded, not amused. He also had noticed that he had been calling him 'Draco' the whole time, and had scolded himself yet again for doing that. [He's Malfoy, understand!?] Harry told himself rather diligintly. "What game are you playing at, Malfoy? Huh? Because if you want pity, I'm not giving you anymore."  
  
"Good, Potter. I don't want your pity. I want perfection. To be the best." With admitting that, Draco embarresed, headed toward the Slytherin dorms.  
  
Harry sighed. He was starting to get a little nervous about Draco. Ya, he hated him, but the fact of a person doing that to themself seemed- very odd and, like the Hogwarts ground this morning, it was alien to him. It didn't contrast with his philosophy. Heading toward the Gryffindor common room, he went to go back to sleep. It was Saturday, so he had time to relax.  
  
{I hope Draco's ok.} Harry lastly thought, as he drifted away to sleep.  
  
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Authors Note: I hope it was ok! I know it's long. Please, please, please tell me your opinion on it. It will get more....angsty, unfortunatly, but as that one quote says, 'And the plot yet thickens!' :) 


	2. Power,

It's Not Easy Being Perfect. (part 2)  
  
Author's note: This is a kind of depressing fic, but it get's better in the end. Really, it does :) I guess you could call it a little bit of fluff mixed in there. Also, this does involve homosexual feelings between two teenage boys, so if you're offended, go somewhere else and read. (Harry/Draco pairing, Ron/Hermione, Hermione/Harry)  
  
Copywrite: All of the characters are copywrite J.K Rowling and Warner Bros. I am not using this to gain money, or whatever, I am doing this for the entertainment of myself, and of course the readers :)  
  
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The afternoon sun hang high in the air, as Harry Potter noticed he had took a four hour nap. Yawning loudly, he took off his glasses, cleaned them, and went to go take a shower.  
  
Undressed, he stepped into the shower, trying to adjust the temperature of the water to be exactly right.  
  
"Haaarryyyyy...." Something whispered from behind him. His heart was racing when the- thing whispered his name. He turned around frantically searching for the owner of the mysterious voice. {It was your imagination, Harry. It was.}He sighed loudly, regardless of his heart pounding against his bare chest.  
  
"Haaarry Potterrr..." It whispered sinistly, evilly chuckling afterwards, making its presence very well known.  
  
"Who are you!?" Harry asked boldly, though very visibly afraid, his eyes wide and frantic. No answer. "I asked, Who the hell are you!?" A long silence. Then,  
  
"Lord Voldomort will be verrry proud once I show your tangled limbs to him..." The thing again laughed evilly. Harry's breath quickened, as he relized he was in some deep crap.  
  
Running out of the shower as fast as he could, not worrying about the water running, he grabbed his wand and invisibility cloak. He then ran out of his dormitory, and then relized.  
  
"Damn, I forgot my glasses!" He cursed to himself. Oh well. He would just have to somehow- make it. Though he didn't know any bloody way how to. He pulled the invisibility cloak over him. God, and he was stark naked! Hopefully he wouldn't forget that, and pull it off in a sudden attempt to scream at someone. Running towards professor Dumbledore's office, he ran into Professor Snape, knocking him over from the shear force of his agility.  
  
"What in bloody hell...?!" Snape cursed, looking around, his eyes and mouth wide open. Unfortunatly, Harry didn't have time to laugh, and fortunatly wasn't able to apologize, as he was in a crises from an invisibe...thing. Making it to the swirling staircase, he was let in. Dumbledore was already standing, like he was expecting Harry's presence (as always.). Harry removed the Invisibility cloak from his head, and left the rest of his body covered. "Professor, something atacked me in the bathroom!" After shouting that, I got a little embarresed at the fact I was in the bathroom in the first place when it had to 'attack...'  
  
"Ok, Harry. We will get some professors there right away to inspect your dormitory. Is that ok with you?" Dumbledore asked politely. Harry nodded quickly, and added "Thank you, professor." Dumbledore nodded, and orderred, "You just stay here for a few moments while I rid of the fiend."  
  
I stood there for about 4 minutes looking around his office yet again out of boredom.  
  
Out of nowhere, Dumbledore apparated back into his office, and said, "These are the spies I've been talking about, Harry. The only danger they are to you is they contain a direct link to where Voldomort can find you and kill you. All you have to do is run away when they are around. They try to threaten and scare you into staying , so just- run."  
  
Harry nodded again, and left for his dormitory, covering his head back up with the invisiblity cloak. Getting there, he finished his shower. It was kind of hard to, though, because every little noise that he heard scared him, and every time he had to close his eyes because of the shampoo and soap, he was almost scared out of his wits. He felt like something could just litarally come up behind him and rip his guts out.  
  
Eager to get out of the shower, Harry got dressed quickly after drying, and layed back over on his bed.  
  
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They kept happening...over and over...and over. It's been that way a week, now. They started last Sunday, and now they just won't stop. I keep having nightmares of me getting killed by Draco for some reason, except he's the 'Dark Lord' and Voldomort is just the sidekick. It isn't the normal way to die, where you get a knife stabbed into you, and twisted, this is for real torture. They kill me with these horrible bone-cracking spells, ones that I can't control, I don't have a counterspell, or ANYthing! It's just...nonstop torture.  
  
Right now, I was drenched with sweat for the 5th night in a row. 'Damn nightmares...' I muttereed to myself, getting up at around 4:00 AM in the morning on a Sunday. Since I knew I wasn't going to be going back to sleep, I left Ron asleep, deciding not to wake him out of respect, and got up to brush my teeth and get dressed.  
  
Once that was done, Harry headed outside for some extra quidditch time. He was getting a little rusty on his curves from the lack of practices due to the stupid spys that quidditch players had reported seeing in the locker rooms. Well, atleast it (whatever 'it' was) wasn't only after me. Grabbing my enhanced broom, I bolted out of Hogwarts and onto the quidditch field as fast as you could say...well, I guess, quidditch.  
  
Of course, someone beat me- Draco Malfoy. First the lake, now this. Perfect. JUST....perfect. Ugh.  
  
Confidently, I walked out onto the field with broom in hand, and got on it. As I zipped into the sky like lightning, I saw malfoy halfway across the field, gracefully practicing downfalls and taking sharp turns on his broom. Gracefully doing my own movements, and working at my own faults, I kept eyeing Draco. He seemed oddly distracted with his flying. He wasn't doing as well, and was a little shaky. About a minute later, I watched in horror as he just toppled off of his broom, and like a rag doll, hit the bottom grass.  
  
"Oh my god!" I heard myself explain, although I wasn't really thinking anything. I was in shock. After relization hit me, I bolted after the fallen boy, and was there in less than 4 seconds. I landed carefully, and put my broom down and quickly walked over to him. A painful moan escaped his lips, and I bent down.  
  
"Draco, what happened? Are you hurt? Where?" I was frantically spitting out questions, wondering if he had broken a bone. Sure enough, he had.  
  
"Ow...Ow! Harry, stop, it hurts!" Draco whiningly said after Harry had tested his left arm for injury. It was broken, as it had supported his fall. A mirical that he hadn't gotten head injury, the way he was falling.  
  
After acknowledging that his arm was indeed broken, and it needed ammediate attention, I asked a quick question before he had to be helped to the hospital wing.  
  
"What happened there? Why did you just suddenly fall off your broom?" Harry asked worringly.  
  
"I...I blacked out." Draco responded.  
  
"Why would you just black out, Draco? You haven't ever done that at all during practices or games." Harry retorted.  
  
"Just take me to the hospital wing, damnit!" Draco ranted.  
  
Harry paused, and thought, taking advantage of the situation to scare Draco a little for amusment. A small smile spread across Harry's lips, as the very idea formed in his head.  
  
"Did you know..." Harry stared deeply into Draco's grey/blue ones. "that I could kill you right now? There is no one here to protect you, Draco. Not your wand, or your father, or...Voldomort. Nothing but...my dignity." Draco wasn't able to get up due to the pain in his arm.  
  
"Com'on, Potter, is this your idea of a joke? Get me to Madame Pomfrey." Draco said calmly, a little to soft than he would usually say it.  
  
Harry took out a small, but sharp knife out of his robe pocket (Ron had taught him a magic trick to do with the knife, and he put it in there to show others.) "See this knife, Draco? See its sharpness?" Draco's shallow breath was louder than the owls that were off in the distance, as I waved it infront of his face. "I could slice your wrists, and you would bleed to death. For fun, I could slice small marks all over your body, and wound you till it hurt way too much to be able to get up."  
  
Harry smiled a sick twisted smile (that he picked up from Voldomort himself, as odd as it is.) {Perfect. I can feel Draco's fear radiating even outside his body. Haha....He's scared. I'm starting to like this power over him right now. Just a little more, though. For fun.}  
  
Harry moved the glittery object up to Draco's neck, and whispered softly into Draco's ear, "Draco, with one swipe of this magnificent object...I could take your life and you'd be left there, suffering in pain as the blood drips out of your arteries."  
  
As I moved back up, I could see the fear in Draco's eyes. He was starting to well up in tears, despite his inside protests. His eyes met up with mine, pleading that I be lying. That I won't do it. A smirk coveres my lips, as I stand up. "Luckily for you, Draco..." I paused, and smiled more friendlier at him. "I'm not Voldomort."  
  
You could see the relief wash over in his eyes and his body wasn't as tense. He was still fearful, though after all of his worries had gone through his head.  
  
"Come on, Malfoy." I carefully helped Draco sit up, and then stand. After getting used to standing, Draco muttered out, "You just should have killed me." He then turned, trying to walk away without help.  
  
Harry, confused, grabbed Draco's un-broken arm and asked, "What?!"  
  
Draco turned his head, and repeated what he had said. "I said, 'You just should have killed me.' You do have ears, don't you Potter?" Turning back around, he walked a few steps, but collapsed and started to throw up.  
  
All that really came up was water and blood, really. The more time Draco kneeled there, the more he had regretted doing that to him. Scaring him.  
  
I quickly walked over to him, and kneeled beside him. He had stopped throwing up just then, and instead of going straight to the hospital wing, I asked again, but with more compassion in my voice. "Draco...what's wrong with you? Something's going on. I know it."  
  
Draco waited a long time, trying to fit his answer into complete sentances that he could say. "You know, Potter...I've never loved. Atleast any human being. Maybe that's why I hate you. I envy your ability to love." Draco closed his eyes at admitting that he acually envied 'the' Harry Potter. With his eyes slightly closed, he continued to talk, getting in a daze, like he was talking to himself. "My father has never shown me any of it. My mother tried, but we...failed to connect. My father has always been obsessive my whole life. He's always wanted 'perfect grades, good social life, best servent for Voldomort.' Well, maybe that isn't what I want father. Maybe I just want more. I don't want to look the best, be the best, the top. Deep down I want love. Can't you see that?!" Draco yelled to an imaginary Lucius Malfoy.  
  
Draco opened up his eyes again, and saw Harry. He wasn't staring at Draco, he was melonchalantly staring a little to his side. As Harry was deep in thought, Draco had a burning desire to cry. He hid it all his life. The last time he cried was when he was 9. His father scolded him for being a weak, inconsiderate child, and that he should be proud and not like...'that' as he put it. He had to, now. As much as he wanted to stop it, he couldn't control his thoughts that jumped around in his head, ringing in his ears, reaching his eyes...that desperatly wanted to spill tears.  
  
As Harry saw Draco turn his body around, he noticed that he was shivering. Another look, and Harry noticed that he was mistaken. Draco Malfoy was crying. Sobbing.  
  
"Draco..." Harry finally spoke.  
  
Harry moved infront of Draco. He wanted to see them. See the tears. He wanted to see Draco Malfoy cry. He wanted the proof that he wasn't as strong as he made everyone out to believe.  
  
"Draco." Harry recited again. Draco looked up this time at Harry's voice. There they were. The tears. Proof that Draco Malfoy had a heart. Had feelings. He couldn't wait to tell Hermione and Ron.  
  
But yet- he felt that telling them would be a moral sin. A total invasion of someones personal privacy.  
  
While Draco was looking up at him, Harry saw the look on his face and knew he had to comfort him somehow.  
  
As Harry cradled Draco (being careful of his broken arm), Draco sobbed softly into Harry's robes, muttering strange phrases that only he knew what they meant. Parts of his past, maybe. Feelings he had kept. Harry felt really, really bad for scaring him now. Guilty.  
  
When Draco's sobbing died down, Harry helped to life Draco up off of the grass. "Let's go get your arm fixed." Harry said. It was all he could say.  
  
While walking, all draco could think was, 'I can't believe it. I just spilled one of my biggest secrets to Harry Bloody Potter. How I hate him. {No you don't...} Damn that nagging voice! Draco sighed forcefully. Conciences are really annoying.  
  
Draco came to a stop. Something was breathing on him. He could also sense them right behind him. "Harry..." He whispered. "Harry, do you-"  
  
Without thinking, Harry shouted, "Run!" They both sped as fast as they could go on human legs. Both their hearts ached, and they could hardly breath as they ran.  
  
The 'thing' behind them came infront of Harry, going over to Draco. It squealed loudly into Draco's ear, and he fell.  
  
"Draco!" Harry yelled, as his eyes widened. {Don't let him be dead, please, don't let him.} Harry thought over and over, not even remembering their past years of conflict.  
  
~!!!^!!^!!!~~!!!^!!^!!!~~!!!^!!^!!!~~!!!^!!^!!!~~!!!^!!^!!!~~!!!^!!^!!!~  
  
So....How was the second chapter? Hehehehe....sorry about it being a little...overly graphic, but oh wells. Pleeease read and review! I would greatly appriciate it! Tell me honostly. Hate it? Like it? Please tell me how I can improve :) I'll be writing a third chapter soon. 


	3. Air,

It's Not Easy Being Perfect (3)  
  
Author's note: This is a kind of depressing fic, but it get's better in the end. Really, it does :) I guess you could call it a little bit of fluff mixed in there. Also, this does involve homosexual feelings between two teenage boys, so if you're offended, go somewhere else and read. (Harry/Draco pairing, Ron/Hermione, Hermione/Harry)  
  
Copywrite: All of the characters are copywrite J.K Rowling and Warner Bros. I am not using this to gain money, or whatever, I am doing this for the entertainment of myself, and of course the readers :)  
  
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Draco laid out on the grass, sprawled, his body disturbingly still. Harry turned back to where the thing had attacked, and looked around. He couldn't see it. Anywhere. All of a sudden, he heard a footstep behind him.  
  
"Harrrryyyy...." It hissed antagonisingly. It's body of white mist came towards him at rapid speed, it hissing as loudly as it could go.  
  
Harry's ears hurt him. His mind couldn't think. Sweat head formed over his whole body, and he noticed sound coming out of his mouth. He was screaming, trying to endure it's torturous screetching. After a few moments, he passed out.  
  
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~  
  
The light above his eyes was the first to awake Harry. His eyes fluttered, thought he didn't sit up. A deep voice was the first thing he heard, as he woke. Listening harder, he noticed the charming voice of Dumbledore. A voice responded. It was Madam Pomfrey.  
  
"- although, I am very worried about Draco's condition." She replied, finishing a sentence Harry hadn't heard the first of.  
  
"Yes, I know. Along with me. Draco is a good student, if not for his- connections. I will have a talk about it with him when he rocoveres from waking up."  
  
Harry paused in thought, as Dumbledore left the room, scuffing his aged shoes along with him. {What is she worried about? What is he going to talk to Draco about? This doesn't make sense.} Harry thought in confusion. If only he had woke up a little bit before. He didn't want to awake to Pomfrey just yet, so he closed his eyes again. The silence had gotten unbearable. Falling deeper in his thoughts, Harry drifted off into another deep sleep.  
  
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~  
  
Awake again from Dumbledore, he listened as some sentences of his Headmaster tumbled out of his mouth, not making sense to Harry's not-yet- fully-awakened conciencness. Listening more closely, as well as more awakened, Harry kept his lids closed.  
  
"Draco, I- I need to talk to you about something. You don't have to conform, if you don't want." Dumbledore mumbled out of his beard covered mouth.  
  
"Yes, Headmaster?" Harry heard Draco respond in a softly weak voice.  
  
"Draco we- Madam Pomfrey and I, have found- have found some markings on your wrists. Your weight is also very abnormal. Is there- is there anything you'd like to talk about?" Dumbledore hesitantly asked.  
  
Harry pondered this for a second.{Markings, on his wrist? I wonder....Maybe the Dark Mark. But then again, he said 'Marking(s) with an S. And his weight,} Harry stopped in midsentence, as he already knew what Dumbledore meant by that. He knew what he had been hinting at.  
  
Draco had paled at their discovery. No words had yet escaped his mouth. Draco had decided what he had to do. Nothing.  
  
"No, Headmaster. I- I don't wish to talk about it." Draco's face turned away from Dumbledore's concerned gaze in his eyes.  
  
"Are you sure, Draco?" Dumbledore asked, yet again.  
  
Draco gritted his teeth, closed his eyes, still facing away from the silent interrogation. "Yes." He responded.  
  
Dumbledore sighed, giving up, and scuffed out of the hospital wing. Harry found the chat between Dumbledore and Draco very intresting indeed. He wished they had atleast mentioned a little- more. Deciding it was time to wake up, he fluttered his eyes open. From the corner of his eyes, he could see Draco on the bed beside him, his eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling. Acting like he had just woke up, Harry sat up, and let out a quite an attention recieved yawn.  
  
Draco looked over at Harry, frowning. "Finally you woke up." Draco responded to the rediculous yawn. Harry looked at Draco and nodded groggily. "How long have we been out?" Harry asked, acting oblivious to the conversation Draco had had before.  
  
"About two days, Dumbledore says." Draco responded.  
  
"Dumbledore was here?" Harry asked, pretending to be confused.  
  
Draco looked at Harry for a longer moment, and snapped, "You're very bad at lying, Potter. Thought you should know that." Draco turned to look at the ceiling again, an expression of offendance upon his face. {How did he know...?} Harry thought agaze.  
  
Harry sighed. {Well, since he already knows he was here and talking, I might as well ask him.} Harry thought.  
  
"What did he mean?" Asked Harry thoughtlessly.  
  
"Who?" Draco asked, forgetting about everything, before a thought hit him again about Dumbledore. "Oh, ya, him...Um..." He didn't know what to say. He really didn't. Did Harry know at all? {God, I hope he doesn't.} Draco thought horridly.  
  
"He said something about Markings and your weight. Was it the Dark Mark he was talking about?" Harry asked, expectantly looking over at Draco for an answer.  
  
"No, Potter, he wasn't talking about the Dark Mark!" Draco snapped at him. {How could he be so ignorant?} Draco thought to himself, fuming. "I don't want to talk about it, Potter." Draco responded after calming down, though still gritting his teeth. He turned on his back to avoid Harry's questioning gaze.  
  
{Well, I best leave it at that, or I'll get yelled at again by the mighty Malfoy.} Harry thought sarcastically to himself. What is he hiding?  
  
Pomfrey entered the room quietly, thinking Harry and Draco were asleep, but was surprised at them both fully wide awake.  
  
"Ok, boys, you can go back to your dormitories, now."  
  
Harry and Draco both got out of the hospital beds, and were heading toward the door, when Pomfrey added, "Oh, but Draco, you need to stay here a couple more minutes. I need to do some extra tests on you. Harry, go along now."  
  
Draco grunted, and walked over defeatedly over to Madam Pomfrey. All the while, her going over what tests she was going to do.  
  
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~  
  
Harry hurried to his dormitory. He knew it was morning, as windows he had passed had shown the sun peaking over the horizon in the east. Ron should be asleep, as well as Seamus and the others.  
  
Sneaking quietly in, he shut the door, and headed over to his trunk. Clicking it open, he reached to the bottom, and clutched the ever enduring invisibility cloak. Smiling smugly to himself, he then heard Ron moan a little in his sleep, and heard him mutter, "Harry....harry, is't you?" Before Ron could find out if it really was Harry, he stormed out of the dormitory, and into the halls. He had to catch Draco going to his dormitory, sneak in to the Slytherin portrait without Draco's knowledge, and follow him. He had to find out what those markings were. He always dismissed the muggle saying, 'Curiosity killed the cat.' In this case, Harry didn't believe it killed, he believed it put the cat in very, very huge danger.  
  
A glint of blonde hair and pale face had attracted Harry's attention, and he turned. Draco was heading towards his way to the Slytherin portrait.  
  
"Reaks of rats." Draco said, and the potrait swung open, Harry following close behind, yet not too close as to be found out. {Reaks of rats? That is the wierdest password I have ever heard.} Harry thought to himself. The Slytherin common room was cold, even though the fire was lit. Maybe the Slytherin's cold attitudes and stares they could give in here had chilled up the room.  
  
Trailing up the stairs behind Draco, they came to a room, and Draco walked in just as quietly. Walking to his bed, he sat down, and layed staring up at the ceiling. Unfortunatly, this was all Harry had to do. Watch, and wait. He was here to gain some knowledge, damnit, not sit and stare!  
  
Draco pulled the curtains, and Harry noticed that he was near Draco, near his bed. Harry cringed at the thought of what Draco had done to him all these past years. It was morbidly disturbing that he would even think that he would follow the little ferret to his bed area with his own free will.  
  
Draco pulled off his black robes, and pulled aside the curtians, heading for the shower. Harry was left standing under the invisibility cloak, and sighed when he heard the door close, and the sound of a shower running. He sat down on the bed, and uncovered his head. This was going to be a long night.  
  
About 15 minutes later, Draco walked back into the curtains, luckily not naked. That would be a difficult sight to see.  
  
He had boxers on them, that, not surprisingly, had his name all over them. Harry tried his best to keep his laugh in, and keep his cover. He had stood back up and put the invisibility cloak over his head before Draco had even opened the curtains before, of course. He didn't have a shirt on, so their wasn't much to miss of his- his wrists.  
  
Harry looked down from Draco's face, and paced to his wrists. They had scabbed over gashes on them, horribly deep. Alot of them. They would most likely leave a scar. As much as Harry wanted, he couldn't ask the question that gagged his mind.  
  
He wanted so desperatly to ask, 'Malfoy, do you cut yourself?' But he kept quiet. Very quiet. Draco stepped out of the curtains again, and Harry stepped out as well being careful not to make any sound. Walking over to where Draco stood, he noticed that he stood over a scale. A weight scale. It read- '87 Ibs.'  
  
{....Oh gods This isn't right.} Harry stared at the scale longer, and noticed that he was correct. 87. Draco shouldn't have weighed that much. For his height and his muscle that quidditch had formed on him, this just didn't conform.  
  
Draco, staring down at the scale, muttered, "Damn. Gained two pounds. Stupid Pomfrey stuck that needle in me. Thought she could feed me like a little baby. I don't need it. I don't need any of it." Harry had to really listen, and luckily had caught this confession.  
  
Draco was sick. Awefully, and morbidly- sick.  
  
Following Draco back to his bed, he watched- watched, and waited to see what was to result. Then, he saw it.  
  
The glittery piece of metal that potruded from a secret place under his bed. Draco, holding it up, frowned, and brought it slowly to his skin. {Why do I do this?} Draco thought to himself, laying the metal to his skin, but since distracted from thought, didn't move his hand. {Why have I started this? It's not- not normal. If anyone else knew about this, they would think I was a crazy homocidal lunatic....} He started having second thoughts again, like every time he had done this. He refocused his attention back to what he was doing.  
  
Harry watched in slight shock at what he knew Draco was about to do. He held the blade up a little, and came down. Right before he hit the skin, Harry decided to stop this.  
  
"No!" Harry shouted. A slight worry shook at waking the others, but it was put to the side rather quickly.  
  
Draco had jumped at Harry shouting, and stared at Harry in shock. In utter, total shock. He was gaping, and quivering at the same time. Gulping, Harry finally let out a stuttered word. "D-don't." Harry eyed Draco frantically.  
  
"How the hell did you get in here?!" Draco whispered loudly, meaning it would have been a scream if he didn't have others in the room sleeping.  
  
"I- I- invisibility cloak." Was all Harry said. It's all he really could say.  
  
There was an odd, very tense, but very odd silence that had poked its head through at that moment. It was a silence that was not appreciated right at the moment.  
  
Draco took his head between his hands, and looked down, lookd away from Harry. He couldn't handle this. Not now. Not yet. He knew he would ask questions.  
  
"Why?" Harry asked the one worded question.  
  
Draco's silver gaze met up with Harry's, and he asked again. "Why do you do this?" It sounded more of an accusation this time.  
  
"I- I don't know, ok?!" Draco snapped, his voice tight and rough. He was looking back down. Draco decided to continue. To hell with what Harry thought. Maybe he would find a little about himself with his forced confession. "I...I do it because whenever I do...I feel a release. I can't explain it Harry, it's- It's different than crying, or anything else. It's like I'm somewhere else, somewhere peaceful. Somewhere I don't have to be bossed around, told where my life has to go. I saw Voldomort over winter vacation last week...."  
  
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~FLASHBACK~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~  
  
Draco entered the Malfoy Manor, expecting the presents to be piled atop in his personal room. He ran into the long corridor, past the door of his mother and fathers room, and raced up the stairs. He stopped, midway, as a recognizable figure loomed overhead.  
  
"Hello Draco." It was his father, Lucius Malfoy. He was staring down at Draco, a mischevious smile spread on his face.  
  
"H-hello father." Draco sputtered out. He didn't want to talk to his father right now. He was too happy. He was in a good mood.  
  
"Draco, I want you to see one of your presents, up in your room." Lucius added. He walked slowly, Draco following behind obediantly.  
  
"Such a good boy, Draco. You'll make a fine death eater some day." His father grinned behind his shoulder at Draco, Draco smiling falsely back.  
  
They had reached the door to his room, and Lucius opened the door for his blonde-haired son to enter.  
  
Draco entered. In the corner of his room, he saw a creature that he had never seen before. It was rather ugly. It turned it's eyes toward Draco, and the creatures gaze struck Draco's heart and soul and body into fear. Fear like he had never known.  
  
"Lucius, Leave us." It hissed loudly. "Yes, Lord, of course." Lucius said hesitantly, frowning. At the time, Draco had noticed the trademark 'Lord'. His father would never call anyone that, other than-  
  
"You do know who I am, don't you, Draco?" Draco nodded fearfully, understandingly. This creature, this thing- Voldemort. It was disgusting. It slithered it's way into people's hearts through fear, made them shrink against their will.  
  
"Don't nod at me, boy, Speak!" It yelled contently.  
  
"Yes, y-yes, um- Your the Dark Lord. I'm- honored sir. Honestly. I was just so- so surprised at seeing your great presence without being told." Draco lied. He really had expected to see Voldemort during the summer, not now. Not during the holidays.  
  
"Good. Come here, boy." It spoke, softly, and silently threatening.  
  
Draco inched closer. It's finger kept pulling inwards, pushing Draco to come nearer. With every step he took, it filled in him. The fear, the thoughts of death racing through his head. His eyes were filled with panic, though he tried his hardest not to show it. Draco was about half a foot away from Voldemort, when it spoke to him. "Don't worry- It's never when people aren't awed at my presence." Draco almost gagged on his breath. It was like rotting flesh. If he hadn't guessed already so, he would have sworn he was a full fledged canibal.  
  
"If I might ask, Lord, why- why have you come earlier than expected?" Draco asked, not meeting the Dark Lord's peircing snake eyes.  
  
"Because.....I wanted to see you before you were marked over the summer...I wanted to see if you were as worthy as your father, Lucius, says you are." It hissed, yet again. It's finger brought Draco's face and gaze up. Draco was then forced to look into his eyes.  
  
"You're so beautiful, you know that?" It hissed loudly near his ear, seducing him into trust. Draco wasn't fooled. He already knew that this- this monster. It was different from the stories he had heard about him. He had heard power, greatness, success, and lots of other worthy applauding things, but- now, when he looked at it, at it's seducing glare, it's horrible breath, and just everything about it, it made Draco want to wretch.  
  
Still staring into his eyes, Voldemort leaned near Draco, and licked the side of his cheek with his tounge. Draco shivered, feeling the slimy snake tounge slide over his cheek. It was gross, morbidly disgusting. He wanted to push it away, run, run as far as the lands and hills could go. It then got close to his mouth, and kissed him. This was the worst kiss he had ever had. Unfortunatly, it was the first kiss he had ever recieved.  
  
Draco was forced to let it's tounge enter. The horrible smell and taste intruded upon his mouth and nostrils, but he was too stricken with fear and shock to object. He felt Voldemort slide his hand down to his genatils, and squeeze. Draco gave a soft whimper, though felt like crying at the time. He hated this. Hated being touched, being tasted, kissed, and felt. He wanted to go back to Hogwarts, stay in his bed, cry. That's all. It left his mouth, and his body, and finally responded, "You will be a very, very worthy Death Eater, won't you, Draco?" Voldemort asked softly but menecingly.  
  
"Y-yes. Yes, Lord." Draco said. And that was all that he said, before Voldemort walked out of the door with a sly, steady walk. Draco had made an unconcience decision at the time- He would never, ever, if his life depended on it, work for that creature, that- that monster...ever!  
  
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~FLASHBACK END~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~  
  
Draco had told the whole story, about Voldemort, the kissing, and the touching. Harry hadn't interrupted one bit, not one word at all. Draco had told him how Voldemort tasted, felt, what happened- everything.  
  
Looking back up at Harry, he relized he was staring at Draco as if he now understood everything. Draco looked back down, too empty in his heart to do anything else.  
  
{I...I have to apologize to him. All these years, I've teased and ridiculed- all for a monster. A disgusting, and horrible monster. Poor Harry....God, I should have listened when he told me how horrible he really was. I should have listened, but I...}  
  
"Harry.." Draco started, trying hard not to break eye contact. "Harry, I'm sorry....sorry for everything. It- It wasn't- I was just an ignorant child then- a confused, ignorant....child."  
  
Draco's gaze wavered, waiting for Harry to respond. Atleast say anything. Reject his apology, anything!  
  
"Glad you've grown up, then, Malfoy. Or- Draco." Harry slightly smiled, but frowned again. He closed his eyes, and sighed.  
  
He opened his eyes back up, and they were staring intently, and seriously into Draco's silver ones. "But, please- please stop what you're doing to yourself. It isn't doing anything but causing you more pain. Causing- causing everyone else more pain." Harry relized.  
  
Draco snorted, and muttered, "Yeah, like anyone cares for me, Potter. They don't, as much as they could try and prove it. They all hate me. They think I'm an insufferable git who can't stay out of other people's buissness."  
  
Harry looked down. Draco was right- by a fraction.  
  
"Draco...I'm not them." Harry stated. He looked up at Draco's gaze, and back down. Draco sighed, also looking down, not sure what to say.  
  
Harry looked up at Draco's cast down glance, and without thinking, grazed Draco's cheek softly with his thumb, his other fingers under his chin, dragging his face upwards. Harry couldn't turn away from him. Not now.  
  
Leaning in, Harry softly touched Draco's lips with his own, getting used to his smell. He smelled sweet, oddly reminding him of a mild form of syrup. Harry went onward. He deepened the kiss, leaning more into Draco's arms as he wrapped his arms around Draco's waist. Suddenly, Draco pulled away from the kiss.  
  
"Stop- please, Harry. Stop." Draco abruptly said, ending the kiss, and the holding. "I- I can't do this. Please." He said afterwards. Harry dissapointadly nodded, and said after an enduring silence. "Ok, well...I-ll just- go then." Harry responded. He turned his back, picked up the invisibility cloak, and right before he put it over himself, Draco managed a sentence. "Bye, Potter. See you in potions tomorrow." Harry didn't turn, but managed a slight smile, and said, "Bye." and headed out.  
  
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In the corridors, he thought about everything that had happened. God....It was slightly disturbing, but he had to do something. Something to help, anything. As much as he tried to not hold the grudge against Draco's past feedbacks, he couldn't help but not hate him just a bit. He had caused him so much pain, emberrasment to him and his friends. Harry Headed to the Gryffindor tower, all the while not getting caught.  
  
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Wow, that was....Um, well...better than I thought I would have done. :) I hoped you all liked this chapter (aside from the, as I said in the last chapter, graphic disturbances, although I'm sure you all have read worse.) Please tell me if you liked it :) If not, then oh wells, it will help me (if you tell me what I did that you wouldn't have liked.) Also, the fourth chapter will be up soon :) I'd also like to appriciate some reviews I have gotten so far-  
  
(Ch. 1)..Children,TheEmuIsNotAToy- whats a flame?please email me.Oh,I'll read ur story later.i can relate to it.its not easy being perfect*sighs* (Re: Lol, no it isn't easy being perfect :) By the way a flame is when someone tells you a very negative thing about your story without telling you the exact reason that they didn't like it.)  
  
(Ch.1)..Nikoda Lynn Snape- I love this story. Although I am against Draco being a Deatheater. I love this story you need to write more. I would really like to read my stories too. They won't be as good as your's but I really try. (Re: Thank you! I'm also against Draco being a Death Eater. I've read a couple of your stories :) I liked the comedy one. Forgot what it was called, but I loved it! It was so funny! :) And about your's not being as good at mine, well, all I can say is don't put yourself down. In my opinion, you do pretty well. Atleast you made me howl in laughter, and almost made me cry it was so funny.)  
  
(Ch. 2)..LadyBlondHair- Is Draco having eating disorders?? ?I hope so..I mean I don't think it's goos for people to have them but I have been waiting for someone to write about Draco haveing like anorexia or something like that... (Re: Yes, he has an eating disorder. I've always wondered how Draco kept so...I don't know. Small, I would say.)  
  
(Ch. 2)..Nikoda Lynn Snape- I love it once again. I always knew Draco had a heart. People say I'm crazy for saying so. But we all have our thoughts. I love this story I hope you'll write more soon!!! (Re: As you can see above, I have :) I also believe he has a heart. Unfortunatly, I guess not alot of people who are Harry Potter fans see that. Thank you so much for the compliments! I hope you like the rest of it. ) 


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